[regamble]

Sadly, between an extreme case of ADHD and a broken edit button I have had my share of things I wish I hadn't said. Here's a few of my best (er um worst).

Wife: I think I've put on some extra weight.
Me: Well duh, you've had 3 kids. Crap, what I meant is... um.. I'll be in the shop.

Wife: I'm feeling a bit frisky tonight.
Me: (Thinking she meant like she wanted to debate. I was sadly incorrect) I'll be in the shop, have fun with that.

Wife: (after customer parts ordered, installed and car is ready for pickup) So, how much do they owe you on this one.
Me: Nothing, it was a trade deal.
Wife: What? Another one? How many cars do you need?
Me: I want as many cars as I want women.

Wife: Why do you work on so many customer cars but I can't get you to do a simple thing to mine.
Me: Because the customers help pay the bills.

Wife: You need to put up a fence to try and hide the cars and shop.
Me: Just get your sister to stand in the driveway. That'll hide it all.

Wife: My sister says she thinks you drink too much.
Me: I'll drink to that. Besides, she may think I drink too much, but I KNOW she eats too much.

Wife: Why do you need a fridge in the shop?
Me: To keep some things like food, pop, and scotch in.
Wife: Much more out there and you could almost live there.
Me: Damn, you caught on.

Wife: You already have a nice hot rod, do you really need another one?
Me: Well, I already have a wife but I really want a girlfriend.
Wife: If I can have a boyfriend you can have a girlfried.
Me: Oh, you mean we're not already doing that? I need to go make a call, and I better do it before 7:00.