[Cobrabill]

A few pointers from your friendly(?!) neighborhood rail


Let's start with some DON'Ts.
1) A train is really, really big. Can we all accept that? Not even your Ram/F350/Hummer/douche-mobile is a match for a locomotive. You say you have a Cummins diesel? Caterpillar? Detroit? Oooooooh. Well I have an EMD 567 on a bad day, and even its pathetic eighteen-hundred horsepower will pound you and your gleaming pickup into the fourth dimension, so please, stay behind the white line!

2) I hate blocking crossings. Seriously, I feel like a complete asshole when I stop a train in the middle of the road and leave two dozen motorists to ponder their lattes and ask what the hell I'm doing.
The truth is, sometimes it has to be done, so don't honk at me, flip me off, or scream at me from the window of your Dodge Caravan as you're shooting a U. Instead, be patient and try to believe that there's a point to what I'm doing. It's called switching, and my conductor is depending on me to work slowly and not run his ass over. If you don't believe me, Wiki that ****.

3) Don't climb on the equipment. I hate to sound like your mother, but you're saving me a lot of paperwork and horrifying flashbacks by staying off the equipment. To you it might look like an abandoned train or a free ride, but when that bastard starts to move with you on it, there's a damn good chance you won't be able to hold on. As long as you're on Wikipedia, punch in "slack action" and see what comes up. Also, the romance of riding freight trains is total bull****. They're really dark, really cold, really windy, and hobos are frigging SCARY.

4) Don't put sh!t on the tracks. It's dangerous to me and my conductor, and it's ten times more dangerous for you and everyone else on the ground. If you're wondering "can a train go over a rock?" the answer is YES. There's only one problem. You probably haven't wondered where the million shards of rock are going to go at four times the speed of sound, have you?

5) Stop whining about the horn. Countless accidents have been avoided because drivers missed the flashing lights but heard the horn. You'd have to blast Miley Cyrus and Lil' Bow Wow pretty frigging loud to drown out a five-chime, and often that's the only thing that saves people. Still, that's no reason to keep your stereo at eighty decibels as you're rolling through a crossing at sixty without looking both ways.

6) By and large, railroad cops are major douche bags, so when you're trespassing on railroad property, keep your head out of your ass. These guys didn't make it into the real police force, and they will ream your ass inside and out to make up for it. Also, walking on bridges and in tunnels is extremely dangerous. Ask yourself: If a train comes, where will I go? Trains are much wider than the rails they run on, so don’t be fooled.

Now for some of the DO'S.

1) If you see a large object (like a garbage can or an F350) that's about to get love-tapped by a hotshot freight train, get in the clear. If the ****'s about to fly at a railroad crossing, run to the side of the street that the train is coming from. That way you'll be behind the point of impact and you won't have to worry about catching that beautiful pickup and its over-confident driver square on your frigging shoulders. If you run away from the train you're just putting yourself in the line of fire, and the death toll could very possibly be two.

2) If the gates stay down and the lights stay flashing, stay where you are. I guaran-damn-tee there's another train coming, and speeding onto the tracks the moment the first train clears is a lot like celebrating a touchdown too early. WHAM.

3) When you're waiting for a train to pass, it's a good idea to stay back thirty or forty feet. Trains are operated by professionals, but often they're loaded by total assclowns. I've heard some real nasty stories about payloads falling off flatcars and crushing people in their vehicles, or doors sliding off boxcars and ripping through everything in their path. It's rare, but **** happens!

4) Always report problems or suspicious activity. If you see a photographer with a radio scanner and a big-ass notebook, ignore him. We know that guy. But if there's a dude in street clothes working a crowbar through a signal box, hit us up and tell us what the deal is. Railroad crossings usually have signs with emergency numbers, or you can call the non-emergency number for your local fuzz. If an accident has already occurred or a life is at risk, call 911 instead. They have our number.

5) Last but not least, when you're inconvenienced by a train, remember that we're pulling for you! Trains are a great way to conserve fuel, reduce greenhouse gas emissions, and keep American jobs alive and green. Rail technology is the best solution to our energy crisis, and as the rail network grows in the years to come, it's important for everyone to stay safe. Look, listen, LIVE.

[2002Z4CSS]

5 or 6 kids died near my area this summer when the guy driving a Ford Fusion thought he could beat a train going 50 mph. The wreck was caught on a local business' security camera. The guy never slowed down. To top it off his licence was taken away the day before. Now the scene looks like a huge memorial. Sometimes you can't fix stupid.

[bird72]

Good stuff Bill, thanks! I read it all and even learned a little bit. Now go work on your hippie attitude

[stevensonDNL]

Thanks, Cobrabill for that sound lesson. I like your attitude! I like trains, but I've never worked for the railroad.

Dan

[theYman]

As a former CSX conductor, WELL SAID! People don't have clue. We always had "fun" in Chicago,seems like just about every week someone was killed trying to outrun a train.

As one who has changed more than a few Michiana filters and cylinder liners in my time; and also
turned a few siderod bushings and steam locomotive tires (that had flats from an emergency stop)
I concur with everything Bill said!!

PS Tho I still much prefer the moaning of a steam whistle way off in the distance in the dark I do
understand that reference to the five-chime.

BTW I wasnt the apprentice who ran the steamer thru the side of the roundhouse at Newark Oh in 1956.

[Brian Baker]

14 year old girl lost her life walking to school yesterday in my area, crossing the tracks in the corridor between Baltimore-Philly, struck by an Amtrak train (they commonly run roughly 100-MPH through this section).

[David Holmberg]

My Grandfather was a career long Railroad man. I have pictures of me at 3 yrs old playing on car frames that were sitting on his rail yard.

Anyone here remember the old DT&I? Detroit, Toledo and Ironton, that moved parts for Ford.

I have an Oak Seth Thomas wall clock from the late 1800's, that he got when he closed down an old station.

His Father was also a railroad man, and I have his little notebooks where they had to keep a record of the temps and track conditions. Cool stuff.

[69goatboy]

Damn.

I guess I have to stop putting pennies on the tracks now.

[Ron Landis]

lost his life here recently walking home from football practice. Took a shortcut walking down the middle of the tracks listening to his headphones! I feel for the guys in the train. Must be a horrifyingly helpless feeling.

[drailed]

Originally Posted by Ron Landis-formerly Jegstek

lost his life here recently walking home from football practice. Took a shortcut walking down the middle of the tracks listening to his headphones! I feel for the guys in the train. Must be a horrifyingly helpless feeling.

Definitely an awkward feeling the first time it happens.

[webfoot]

(mostly for kids) You might think playing chicken with a train is funny, but the crew sure as hell doesn't. The only reason we're going so slow is because of a slow order or you'd be minced meat.

[theYman]

Originally Posted by Brian Baker

14 year old girl lost her life walking to school yesterday in my area, crossing the tracks in the corridor between Baltimore-Philly, struck by an Amtrak train (they commonly run roughly 100-MPH through this section).

I know a large train looks very fast, but the maximum ALLOWED speed on US rails for an amtrak train is 70MPH.

[codyyy]

Most of this seems like common sense to me, but always good for a refresher. I take it something happened to you recently or someone you know that caused this post.
On a side note, I really want a set of Nathans on my car, perhaps the GTO. Not only do I love the sound, but if I actually have to use my horns, might as well make it worth hearing. I rarely ever use my horns if at all so that probably would be a waste.

[Cobrabill]

Statistics say rails will kill 7 people during their career(based on a 30 year time frame)

Our double mains run right thru downtown(local college bar area) Tucson.Sometimes we end up stopped before we get to the yard.

There were two dipsh!ts(in their 20's) who decided train hopping after consuming copious amounts of alcohol was a good idea.And they were texting each other while doing it.One would text:"i'm on this train over here".The other would text back:"Well-i'm on this one that's moving over here".How do i know they were texting each other?............

So....the EB starts pulling and the slack runs out and pops this guy off the car and he lands between the cars.The following car cuts his head off.The crew has no-idea as they are 4000ft to the east.
The train behind comes along and finds the head-less corpse WITH the cellphone still in his hand with the above mentioned text still on the screen.

Needless to say there was a bunch of "Head-less texters" jokes going 'round.

[Cobrabill]

Originally Posted by theYman

I know a large train looks very fast, but the maximum ALLOWED speed on US rails for an amtrak train is 70MPH.

Amtrash can run 80 mph

And in the NE Corridor,Acela runs 150 mph

[theYman]

Originally Posted by Cobrabill

Amtrash can run 80 mph

And in the NE Corridor,Acela runs 150 mph

Wow! only 70 in Ohio to Chicago.. 150 ! crazy

[Cobrabill]

Google "Acela"-it's not your average "beer can".ANd there are no gade crossings.

[mechanickeith]

Bill, Is the new line open yet that has been going in between maricopa & Gila Bend???

[Cobrabill]

Are you talking about "Double track"?