 |
|
| THE LOBBY A gathering place. Introductions, sports, showin' off your ride, birthday-anniversary-milestone, achievements, family oriented humor. |
| Reply |
|
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
|
#1
03-16-2011, 04:47 PM
|
||||
|
||||
Things NOT to say to your wife!!
I think this can be a fun thread where we men can learn from each other and the women can "perhaps" tudor us into the "right thing" while having their suspicions about us confirmed...
A while back my wife asked me if I thought her belly was getting too big, we both are in our 40's. For whatever reason, the automatic NO-ometer malfunctioned and failed to activate and I (no so) thoughtfully answered: "Honey, everyone can use some sit-ups." I think it's the longest I've gone without loving, except deployments, since we've been married.
__________________
 Johnny US Army Retired1978 T/A 463 Pontiac, KRE 74cc 300CFM D-ports, Howard's custom SFT, Nash Intake,QFT 950 E85 carb, TCI TH-350, 4200 converter 3.73 12 bolt [email protected] 1981 T/A 4-speed 406 Pontiac, Merrick ported 6X heads, Comp 270S cam, Crosswind intake 750 Street Demon, 3.42 30 spline Eaton posi street car. 1972 LeMans 350 Pontiac H/S Drags project |
|
#2
03-16-2011, 04:57 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
No Honey, those pants dont make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat.
__________________
Keith Collier 61-63 Pontiac Tempest Tech advisor POCI.org |
|
#3
03-16-2011, 05:03 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I've been married long enough to know to not even hesitate a nano-second when answering questions of that nature.
Something tells me this is going to be a loooong thread. 
__________________
The joker in the deck keeps sending me his card. Smiling friendly, he takes me in. Then breaks my back in a game I can't win. |
|
#4
03-16-2011, 05:23 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Dear, do I need to break up with my girlfriend?
__________________
'68 GTO 4-spd Hardtop (11) '68 GTO Convertible AT (1) '70 LeMans Sport Land of Lakes Muscle Car Classic Facebook Event Facebook Wall (Kurt Smith,Minneapolis) |
|
#5
03-16-2011, 05:39 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Tupperware bowl? Yeah I dropped the pan on my tranny,I think it's still in the garage.
__________________
 ‘63 LeMans- ‘69 400 w/ original transaxle. 2.69 gears. ‘55 Catalina ‘62 Mercury Meteor-all original, bought new by my grandfather 71' GTO -original 400/4-speed/3.23 posi 13.95 @ 102.1 on street tires @ 4055lbs.-now my sons ride |
|
#6
03-16-2011, 05:43 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Being honest has been a curse to me.
__________________
If you cant drive from gas pump to gas pump across the map, its not a street car. http://s207.photobucket.com/albums/b...hop/?start=100 |
|
#7
03-16-2011, 05:49 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Mark grenaded his rear end,so we had it towed here. It will only be in the driveway a few weeks.
__________________
‘63 LeMans- ‘69 400 w/ original transaxle. 2.69 gears. ‘55 Catalina ‘62 Mercury Meteor-all original, bought new by my grandfather 71' GTO -original 400/4-speed/3.23 posi 13.95 @ 102.1 on street tires @ 4055lbs.-now my sons ride |
|
#8
03-16-2011, 05:56 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Here's one that I was smart enough not to answer incorrectly.
My son's father-in-law was widowed several years before my son met his wife. During their engagement, the f-i-l started dating his deceased wife's divorced sister (they have since married). Kinda freaked the daughter a bit that her dad was dating her aunt but laugh about it now. Anyway, when my wife heard the two were dating, she turns to me and says, "If I died, which one of my sisters would you want to date????" Now, lucky for me, I'm not attracted to either of her sisters. So after a little hesitation (while I considered how this was going to be trouble for me) I said neither which I'm pretty sure is the only "correct" answer to this question/trap. I'm pretty sure you don't want to tell your wife you'd like to date her sister, no matter how hot the sister is or what the circumstances may be! |
|
#9
03-16-2011, 06:08 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
trick question - define "date" <uhoh>
__________________
'68 GTO 4-spd Hardtop (11) '68 GTO Convertible AT (1) '70 LeMans Sport Land of Lakes Muscle Car Classic Facebook Event Facebook Wall (Kurt Smith,Minneapolis) |
|
#10
03-16-2011, 06:23 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
"The guy's & I are taking Skip in a stretch limo to the Gold Club for his 40th birthday." (It was my idea.
 )Turns out, just looking at naked women in her book is cheating.  How was I to know.We went anyways.
__________________
Some guys they just give up living And start dying little by little, piece by piece, Some guys come home from work and wash up, And go racin' in the street. Bruce Springsteen - Racing In The Street - 1978 |
|
#11
03-16-2011, 07:19 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Ouch!! last week i said, is it really neccessary to suck on those chicken bones like that???
|
|
#12
03-16-2011, 07:27 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Wife, "Do you think I'm dumb?
Me, "No you are blond".
__________________
Its ok to giggle and snicker, Dont laugh and point |
|
#13
03-16-2011, 07:33 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
"you're acting like your mother more and more each day"
/Mother is certifiably insane. Seriously she is.
__________________
1947 Ford Coupe 1972 Pontiac Luxury LeMans (Sold to Nephew) 1984 Chevrolet Monte Carlo SS 2003 Chevrolet Monte Carlo SS Jeff Gordon Edition 2017 Dodge Challenger SXT Black Top Edition |
|
#14
03-16-2011, 07:54 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
if you met my SIL you definately would saty single , and my wife knows this , she knows I won't be looking for a replacement unless it has 4 wheels and I don't mean in a wheelchair either . |
|
#15
03-16-2011, 08:12 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
She says "Look I've lost some weight"
You say " No you haven't it's right there behind you!" Funny yes, smart No. |
|
#16
03-16-2011, 08:18 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Yeah, I MIGHT consider selling the Pontiac. Just don't say it.....for any reason.
__________________
1981 Trans Am project -YJ 400 stroked to 488 CID-74cc Eheads-10.95:1-Northwind Intake-Holley Terminator-TH400-3:55 Moser rear-Dougs Headers.... |
|
#17
03-16-2011, 08:23 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
__________________
so many pontiacs, so little time.................. moderator is a glorified word for an unappreciated prick.................. "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein "There is no such thing as a good tax." "We contend that for a nation to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle." - Winston Churchill |
|
#18
03-16-2011, 08:24 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Every so often I've had to put my wife back in check when she starts to get overly controlling or bi7chy.
I let her know that my life would get much easier without her in it. More time to work on cars, more... everything... But we are in a really good place now, so we don't have to "go there" very often, and hopefully never again.
__________________
"...ridge reamer and ring compressor? Do they have tools like that?" |
|
#19
03-16-2011, 08:27 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
BTW I could write a book on this subject. Not sure I want to be the subject of a witch hunt tho...........
__________________
so many pontiacs, so little time.................. moderator is a glorified word for an unappreciated prick.................. "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein "There is no such thing as a good tax." "We contend that for a nation to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle." - Winston Churchill |
|
#20
03-16-2011, 08:27 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Sadly, between an extreme case of ADHD and a broken edit button I have had my share of things I wish I hadn't said. Here's a few of my best (er um worst).
Wife: I think I've put on some extra weight. Me: Well duh, you've had 3 kids. Crap, what I meant is... um.. I'll be in the shop. Wife: I'm feeling a bit frisky tonight. Me: (Thinking she meant like she wanted to debate. I was sadly incorrect) I'll be in the shop, have fun with that. Wife: (after customer parts ordered, installed and car is ready for pickup) So, how much do they owe you on this one. Me: Nothing, it was a trade deal. Wife: What? Another one? How many cars do you need? Me: I want as many cars as I want women. Wife: Why do you work on so many customer cars but I can't get you to do a simple thing to mine. Me: Because the customers help pay the bills. Wife: You need to put up a fence to try and hide the cars and shop. Me: Just get your sister to stand in the driveway. That'll hide it all. Wife: My sister says she thinks you drink too much. Me: I'll drink to that. Besides, she may think I drink too much, but I KNOW she eats too much. Wife: Why do you need a fridge in the shop? Me: To keep some things like food, pop, and scotch in. Wife: Much more out there and you could almost live there. Me: Damn, you caught on. Wife: You already have a nice hot rod, do you really need another one? Me: Well, I already have a wife but I really want a girlfriend. Wife: If I can have a boyfriend you can have a girlfried. Me: Oh, you mean we're not already doing that? I need to go make a call, and I better do it before 7:00.
__________________
If it don't burn gas, eject brass, or have a nice  I'm not interested.65 Star Chief 65 Skylark Conv 66 Fairlane 289 67 Galaxie 390 69 Cougar XR-7 428 69 Javelin 343 SST 73 Ranchero 429SCJ |
| Reply |
|
|
The PY Online Forums is the largest online gathering of Pontiac enthusiasts anywhere in the world. Founded in 1991, it was also the first online forum for people to gather and talk about their Pontiacs. Since then, it has become the mecca of Pontiac technical data and knowledge that no other place can surpass.
Linear Mode
